Make up your damn mind!

The NFL is a topsy-turvy league, I get it. Teams go from worst to first and vice versa rather routinely it seems. How often though will the New York Football Giants do so in the midst of one season? Because they are on their way to doing so again in 2011.

Traveling back a few years, in 2006, New York started rather excitedly at 6-2. They finished 2-6, mercifully made the playoffs at 8-8 and were put out of their misery in the first round by the Philadelphia Eagles.

Everyone then remembers their 2007 campaign even better. They again started 6-2, something we, in the business, call an “Autumn Coughlin.” The second half of their season was a little choppier, losing four times but culminating in a moral victory of sorts against New England in week 17. NE won that final regular season game to clinch their undefeated, 16-0 record. The Giants clinched some feeling of competitive elation that they could play with these boys. From the wild card, the Giants then went on to win the Super Bowl over those same Pats.

The following year, the Giants started off hot, ridiculously hot, best team in the conference hot. They won 11 of their first 12 games. They finished…not so hot, losing three of their final four contests, limping into the playoffs. The Eagles, as in 2006, shoved the Giants out of the playoffs in the first round.

2009 witnessed the G-Men start off 5-0 and promptly lose their next four games. They went on to lose four more, miss the playoffs entirely and waste another fantastic start to their season, a technique people are now calling “pulling a giant.”

Last year, as you may have deduced, the Giants started the year in “Autumn Coughlin” fashion at 6-2. They went a pedestrian 4-4 in their final eight, including debilitating losses against Philly (rather famously) and at Green Bay (rather ominously). Even at 10-6, it wasn’t enough to get in the playoffs, not that they deserved it anyways.

Now here we are again, during New York’s bye week, sitting at 4-2, atop the NFC East. The problem is, the Giants seem like anything but a first place team, almost guaranteeing another year of Autumn Coughlin-ing their way to Pulling a Giant.

To start things off, the Giants are 4-2, having played the easiest schedule in the league. They faced three of the four NFC West foes, the only one still remaining on their docket being the best one, the 49ers. To complicate matters, they have the toughest remaining schedule in all of football. After they play the Dolphins coming out of the bye, the Giants travel to New England and San Francisco (two division leaders), play Philly again, then the Saints and Packers (two more division leaders). Their final four games include two battles with the Cowboys, their remaining Redskins game and a “road” game against the Jets. I’m not saying they will go 2-8 in their last 10, but it’s at least on the table.

As a thorn in their foot, the Giants’ current 4-2 record is rather deceiving. They aren’t even that good. As we said, they have faced the three worst teams in the worst division in football, and didn’t even beat all three, losing to Seattle at home. They were also beyond fortunate to win their game at Arizona the week prior. Their first win of the year, against the Rams, was rather deceiving in itself since the Rams dominated between the twenties. The Giants could barely move the ball on offense without the Rams helping them out with penalties and turnovers. A similar story unfolded against the Eagles the following game even though the scores were not indicative of it. Even if we consider their three point victory over the Bills as “impressive,” that’s simply one win on the year that can be called anything other than fortunate. Throw in the aforementioned home loss to Seattle and an opening game loss to a Redskins team that now looks utterly terrible and the New York Giants are a mess of a 4-2 team.

The positives, if there are any, are in the numbers. The Giants rank in the top 10 in the NFL in offensive yards and points per game. However, their rushing offense, a supposed strength, has been very poor. And their defense has not been consistently strong. Although they lead the league in sacks, their pass defense is near the bottom of the league and they rank 22^nd in the league in points allowed per game.

Although it is very early to rely too much on statistics, one number that jumps out as being indicative of the Giants perhaps being worse than their record indicates is their point differential. On the season, they have only scored 7 more points than they’ve given up. A +7 is usually reserved for teams at .500, not for teams residing in first place in their division. For comparison’s sake, the 49ers, a team that has trouble passing the ball, is +70 in point differential on the young season.

Now I am not saying an apocalypse is definite. There is certainly the possibility that the Giants are a good team who managed, through strength of will, to eek out these early season victories. They will use that momentum to buoy them the rest of the way, fighting through a difficult schedule to win the NFC East title. Anything is possible; likely though? It seems as likely as my Autumn Coughlin catching on as an actual saying in football circles. 

(Image courtesy of nationalsportsbeat.com)

The ultimate showdown

We knew it would come to this. The two best characters from the greatest television drama of all time are up for debate yet again. Only this time, they are off their normal surroundings of west Baltimore and cooped up in an office, or in one's case, The Office.

Stringer Bell, or as he is occasionally referred to, Idris Elba, and Omar Little (Michael K. Williams) have recently gained something else in common. Besides being influential cogs on HBO's groundbreaking series The Wire, they have both been employed by NBC sitcoms in the famed Thursday night comedy block. While Elba had been employed at Dunder Mifflin Paper on The Office for a number of episodes a few seasons back, Williams has just been hired as the new biology teacher at Greendale on Community. This begs the question: which former king of the streets is the best office-dweller?

The argument for who is the best character from The Wire is never-ending. Stringer was fantastic, calculated, evil, entrepreneurial and everything else you would want from the man calling the shots behind Avon Barksdale. Omar, on the other hand, was memorable, inspiring, heroic, and, frankly, bad-ass. He was the perfect lone star, running the streets without need of posse or muscle, just the soothing tones of a whistled nursery rhyme. There is no wrong answer for who was the better character. More accurately, there is no Right answer.

However, moving to a life of books and policy and mission statements may leave us with a different outcome. It is still much too soon to tell since Michael K. Williams has just started his first semester at Greendale but he has an awful lot to live up to.

As Charles Miner on The Office, Idris Elba took over control of the Scranton paper company for half a season. He was installed to create an atmosphere of productivity and seriousness that was lacking under current management. What he ended up bringing was his tremendous American accent, his stoic demeanor in even the most outrageous situations and, oddly, the love of both soccer and volleyball. Stringer will be hard to top here.

What we need out of Omar this season on Community is more than he may be capable of. Only more biology classes will tell us for sure. In the mean time, let us bask in the glory that is typecast actors working in roles we are not used to seeing them in and not being able to separate them from where we know them and loved them. By the way, when does Dominic West start shooting that children's cartoon?

Major League Script

A friend comes up to you saying he has a great idea for a sports movie script. Now this friend is questionable in the ideas department in the first place, so you are skeptical. He’s the same guy who wanted to try that “running with the bulls thing” when he saw it on the news one day.

Now his plot starts off and he explains how it is the beginning of September in the Major League Baseball season. It appears as though all eight playoff spots are reasonably set. Teams will be fighting for positioning and home field advantage, but besides a few competitors a handful of games back, the teams seem decided.

As September progresses, each wild card team, who had close to double digit game leads at the start of the month, begins to collapse. Their bullpens are imploding from overuse and having only a few guys who can be trusted in the first place. The starting rotations are crumbling with injuries with even staff aces missing starts. And the lineups are not producing, at least not consistently. You are thinking to yourself that this seems quite unlikely. I mean it could happen to one team I suppose, blowing an historic lead, but both league wild card teams at the same time? Get real.

When he gets to the end of September, the dueling collapses are complete. Going into game 162, the final game of the year, both the AL and NL wild cards are tied between two teams. Each previous double digit leader has completely lost their lead, fallen from atop their pedestal down to the depths of despair. He decides to emphasize how it’s happening to both leagues at the same time again because he finds this tremendously energizing while you think of it as quite absurd.

The last game of the year, the two previous wild card leaders both have their closers pitching in the ninth inning with a lead and, with a preposterous smile on his face, your friend tells you that they both blow the game, each closer (both of whom were All-Stars this season mind you) blows the save in the ninth.

The NL team goes on to lose in extra innings while their competitor had won earlier in the evening and was simply awaiting results; the ruination is final. The epic and historic September collapse is complete.

Meanwhile, the former AL leader loses in dramatic, walk-off fashion after the blown save and ONLY MINUTES LATER, their competitor wins in dramatic, walk-off fashion having come back from a seven run, eighth inning deficit that very game; the downfall is final. The epic and historic September collapse is complete.

You sit back, staring at your friend and his sense of complete fulfillment and can’t help but feel sorry for him. He asks you what you think and you stay silent for a beat, two beats, three beats. “You are a moron,” you say and walk out of the room.

“Wait,” he calls back. “Would it help the story if the AL MVP and Cy Young winners were the same guy while the NL MVP and Cy Young winners were from the same team, a team that wasn’t even close to making the playoffs? That would be ironic right, kind of add to the story arc?”

You need smarter friends you tell yourself.

(Image courtesy of ajc.com)

College Sports Madness

With the college football season in full swing and college basketball right around the bend, much of my time has been spent on the college game, writing for College Sports Madness.

Here I cover everything from player draft profiles to team season previews and weekly game outlooks. Check out my profile here, where I have written nearly 50 articles up to this point.

The top 8 lists I would like to see - In honor of the eighth and best month

Here is a list of eight lists I would like to see, in honor of the eighth and best month of the year.

1. The top five reasons people hate PDA (public displays of affection).
(this one's a trick question, since there is no good reason to hate something so wonderful)

2. The top ten unofficial holidays / locals only holidays.
(my vote is for Marathon Monday in Boston)

3. The top ten ugly people that Hollywood wants us to believe are attractive.

4. The top twenty excuses for forgetting your own birthday.
(I say excuses because I refuse to believe any one actually does this)

5. The top one hundred moments in history 'they' don't want us to know about.

6. The top twenty things to do on the internet.
(this could be utterly boring and predictable, or surprisingly disgusting)

7. The top ten mixed breeds of dogs.
(imagine if we started calling humans mix breeds, or like Mexinese for Mexican Chinese)

8. The top five places to read the Sports Pinata'
(these have to be different places, they can't all be the bathroom)

Yay August!

Drafting kickers

When it comes to drafting a kicker in fantasy football, there are two accepted schools of thought. Either you take a kicker with your very last pick/dollar or you are an idiot.

The reason a kicker should be selected dead last and never before is because the value is not there to take one any other time. Even using your second to last pick on a kicker instead of a late-round sleeper makes no sense. Go ahead and select a sleeper you have your eye on; there is no reason to risk missing out on that value when another kicker will be there for you after the jump.

To mathematically examine the wastefulness of drafting a kicker before the last round, let’s first make a generous and most likely incorrect assumption. Let’s say, even though it is highly unlikely, you are able to know who will be the very best fantasy kicker before the season begins. Not only is this impossible, but I’ll even throw you that bone because it still doesn’t mean that man should be taken ahead of a player at another position.

Last year’s number one, across the board, best kicker was Nate Kaeding. He did not finish anywhere close to being the number one kicker. But let’s somehow assume you were able to look into the future and KNOW Sebastian Janikowski would be the best fantasy kicker in the league in 2010, which he was.

First of all, what a terrible skill to be able to look into the future and use it for nothing more than knowing the best fantasy kicker. Secondly, it still wouldn’t have been prudent to draft him anywhere before your very last pick. Depending on your league settings, Janikowski scored roughly 10 points per week (~150 points spread over 16 games because of his bye week). Meanwhile, the 12^th ranked kicker, the worst possible kicker you would start in a full, 12-team league because no one would be employing two kickers together, was Mason Crosby last season. He scored about 120 fantasy points or about eight points per fantasy week.

This means that if you were somehow able to know the future, draft the very best possible kicker for the upcoming season, and employed him all year long, you would only have gotten two points per week over the team with the very worst starting kicker in your league, two measly points.

In other news, here is a short list of some of the players drafted in the final few rounds of drafts last year, i.e. players that could have been taken if you hadn’t wasted your pick on a kicker: Darren McFadden, Austin Collie, Josh Freeman, Brandon Lloyd, Peyton Hillis, BenJarvus Green-Ellis, Mike Williams and Michael Vick. That is all.

Read my colleague's counter argument here, courtesy of The Sports Information & Reports Network.

Spoiling Movies: Harry Potter

Ten years, eight films, billions upon billions of dollars and the Harry Potter movie franchise has finally reached its conclusion. The penultimate film left something to be desired, as part ones are prone to do, yet the final film, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part Two was a solid and satisfying piece, perhaps the best film of the entire franchise.

It started with a bit of “previous on Harry Potter” vibe. Voldemort was shown towering over the casket and corpse of the deceased head master, with the Elder Wand in his grasp. The sky lit up with his jubilation and part two was ready to take off.

Unlike many of the previous films, 7.2 finally got the pace and tempo correct. Where all the previous films often felt rushed, especially compared to their novel version, this one actually felt like a smoothly flowing cinematic experience. The reasoning for this was a logical avoidance of plot rather than a helter-skelter rushed/forced plot development.

The main casualty of this was the battle at Hogwarts. Where, in the book, this takes up many action-packed pages, the movie instead uses it as a background event while the rest of the film is taking place. Frankly, if not comparing it directly to its book counterpart, it works very well. The movie had enough action and adventure to stand on its own without the Hogwarts fighting. It also was able to seamlessly make us aware of things that happened during the battle, i.e. people getting killed, without forcing the specific scenes upon us.

The ending was as campy and off-putting as it was in the book version. In my humble opinion, they probably could have done without it entirely, although that would have brought about the vitriol of novel enthusiasts all over the world.

However, the ending to the action, in the movie, left something to be desired as well. Voldemort perished into oblivion with a simple flick away of his wand, floating into the ether shredded like pieces of paper. Perhaps it was fitting but it left a bit of an empty feeling in my stomach. Didn’t the greatest dark wizard who ever lived deserve a more phantasmagorical big bang and classic movie death?

There were other minor complaints, like how Ginny Weasley was essentially nonexistent in this film, but these can be forgiven. Whereas all the previous Potter films seemed to be trying to force the novel into cinema, the Deathly Hallows Part Two instead seemed to be taking the storyline and turning it into a movie, a slight technical difference but one that proves major in the end.

The by-product of this was the ability to concentrate on specific plot elements and excel in scenes such as the viewing of Snape's memories and the searching for the lost diadem.

Nothing is perfect, especially adaptations, yet this seemed a fitting end to a powerful and influential movie franchise, the highest grossing franchise in the history of film.

(Image courtesy of J.K. Rowling's novel cover art)